Laura doesn’t


I don’t drink soda. I don’t think any of my (closest) friends drink soda, either. This isn’t a coincidence. Because I “judge” people who do and think it is unhealthy.

I don’t smoke. I don’t have any friends who smoke. Part of me feels sorry for people who struggle with this addiction because I’ve had my own (eating disorder). I don’t feel sorry for people who smoke just to be cool or don’t try to get help.

I don’t drink coffee. I don’t hold anything against people who drink coffee and know how to savor/enjoy it. I think that is wonderful. It’s people who live off coffee, use it as a substitute for food or go crazy without it that I think need a slower pace.

I don’t drink alcohol. Of course most people drink alcohol. Similar to how my grandmother tried pressuring me into soda, I’ve been warned by older adults in a way that implies people won’t like me because of this, I should just be more normal and drink some wine as part of the social atmosphere. (You won’t get any friends or boyfriend, Laura.) As if I abstain from alcohol on purpose to selfishly draw attention! When I see pictures with a guy wrapping his arm around a girl and holding his beer up in front of her body or close to her face that feels so wrong and disgusting.

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8 thoughts on “Laura doesn’t

  1. I think I will read your book. With eating disorders, it’s said it’s lifelong and you manage it. I’ve “managed” it in an oppositely unhealthy way, sometimes going back to almost healthy only to let the old patterns take over. Even though I believe in God and believe he wants people to be healthy, not obsessed, and not going the opposite direction (overweight…like I do on purpose with pointedly avoiding my old behaviors.) I’ve only begun truly admitting to myself I still have the anorexia whether or not I am living it, and understanding I have to stop looking at it as a way to control myself, getting big from not doing those things, or doing those things and not being big. I speak to people about self esteem and abstaining from risky behaviors all the time in a professional capacity, and have not yet healed that portion of me. So it’s going to heal ^_^ Towards the end of the last year, I turned it over completely to God, along with all the feelings and thoughts I blamed for it, accepting responsibility where I recognize it, and it is improving. My focus is not so much how I’m seen or not seen, how I can “manage” myself ^_^, but how life flows through me for others. I’m curious to see how you are doing it. You’re inspiring.

    • Wow! Thank you so much for this incredibly thoughtful comment and meaningful story :). I hope you read my book and would love your feedback! If you’d ever like to do a guest post for me, that would be great. Keep in touch ~ Laura

  2. You’re following a higher law for your body. Good for you. Keep it up. Seek for others who do the same – there are millions of people who believe and live as you do – you have many friends and companions you haven’t met. Best wishes!

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